Runaway Grapes of Irony

We’ve had two nights of Macayla not sleeping. She seems to be having seizure type activity that wakes her out of a hard sleep. We opted to give her Diastat last night to stop it as we did a few weeks ago. Needless to say, we are tired. Jacob, on the other hand has had two of the best nights of sleep in a long while. This morning, I really wanted to make sure Jacob got to school because his class was going to a swim park and then making banana splits. (Actually, I wanted to leave him with Macayla and I wanted to go!) So, I moved a sleeping Macayla from her bed to her wheelchair and loaded them up to go. But Jacob wanted to take the last four grapes he had from breakfast with him. He picked up his bowl and was carrying that with both hands and his bear was tucked under his arm. He was walking down the slope of the driveway while I was loading Macayla on the van lift. I notice a grape roll across the concrete in front of me and it was followed by the whining voice of Jacob. “Dad, I lost my grape!” My impatience was pretty high this morning and that was aggravated by two sleep-deprived nights. I told him to let it go and get in the van. “But Dad I wanted that one!” By this time, I am walking around to the side of the van to strap Macayla in. Jacob is whining and so worried about the runaway grape that he doesn’t notice that he is tilting his bowl. Two more grapes roll out onto the concrete. Jacob and I paused and watched the two grapes roll under the van and out of reach. The whining and crying were about to pour out of Jacob. I could see it coming like a sandstorm rumbling toward me across a desert plain. But my frustration was faster to the draw! I grabbed the last grape in the bowl put it in Jacob’s hand and then jerked the bowl and took it back into the house. Jacob in the meantime ate his grape and pouted in his car seat. I came back out and told Jacob that he better get his act together and show that he was thankful that he was going to get to go swimming and make banana splits. I reminded him of how difficult it was to get him there because I had such a “hard” night with Macayla. But the reality is that I missed a teachable moment and all I really wanted was to have myself acknowledged. I wasn’t concerned about Jacob being thankful for swimming and banana splits. I wanted him to be thankful for me, Super Dad! What a disappointment I can be. Jacob had four grapes and one rolled away. Once it was gone it was gone and there was no way to get it back. He was so worried about the one that got away that he forgot what he still had, three grapes in his bowl. His whining and concern over the one grape cost him two more. I was so concerned about the sleep that I lost and couldn’t get back. I was so concerned about the acknowledgement that I was not getting, that I missed a great teachable moment for my son. He didn’t need a lesson in “be more careful next time.” He certainly didn’t need a lesson in how well I am at pitching the adult version of a fit. He could have used a lesson in that being thankful comes when we recognize the blessings we do have and that loss can be a lesson in itself. He may have profited from the lesson that when one grape rolls away, it’s not fun, but it makes you appreciate grapes more. Here’s the fruity irony of runaway grapes. Jacob has recently learned about the fruit of God’s Spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, gentleness and self-control. I’ve been encouraging Jacob to ask God to help him be more patient and self-controlled during hard times. Jacob did not see any of those fruit in his Dad this morning. Now that he’s at school, I’ll have to wait until this afternoon to apologize to him and ask for his forgiveness. I hate waiting on that, but there’s a lesson in that too.