I Knew, But Now I KNOW

I've been to multiple funerals. Some have been close family, others just friends. I have always known the "wake," "visitation" or "receiving friends and family" portion of the funeral was an opportunity for the family to experience the comfort of others' presence. I always knew it was meant as an opportunity for others to view the body and have their own moment of closure.

I knew this, but now I KNOW in a new way. When we woke up yesterday morning, I told Jennifer I did not want to do this. I did not want to go to the funeral. I did not want to see Macayla's body again. I did not want to be around anyone. But she reminded me I had to. Macayla's life had a purpose and so did her funeral. We could not let her down. I felt drained of energy even before the day started, but after seeing all of the people come in and having the opportunity to interact with as many as we could, I was refreshed. There was no one phrase, cliche, or phrase that did it. It was simply the presence of all the people who love us and Macayla. It was the overwhelming work of God's grace through a crowd of love.

One of the last couples I spoke with had also lost a child some years ago. I shared this with them. I shared that I finally understood how this portion of a funeral worked. I came in depleted and left for the worship serviced recharged. They relayed a very similar experience with their daughter's death years ago. On top of that, we continue to sort the almost two hundred email messages, many cards and the endless supply of food! We are loved and we love all of you for being here.

When Macayla was born, I thought of a possible wedding in the future. Praying for the right man for her. Praying we could pay for the wedding! Praying I could be there to see it. I thought about the day I would walk her down the aisle. Yesterday, I walked my little girl down the aisle. Not the way I expected or wanted. But I took her to the Groom of grooms. Her mother and I gave her away to the best. The Bible speaks in metaphors of Jesus as the groom and the Church as His bride. Macayla had to leave us, but she has cleaved to Christ in the fullest way possible. Thank you all for being a witness and support to Macayla's life and transition to a new life. Thank you all for your prayers and support over the years. Thank you all for just being there, in presence, prayer and thoughts.

Macayla still has a few more things to say. As the next couple of weeks unfold we will try to share those messages. We are still digesting the last two weeks and there are both some medical lessons we can share on the Uncommon Needs blog as well as some testimony to how this process impacts our family and others. Stay Tuned! We love you.